


An Internal Struggle

by AriHasFallen



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/M, Just trying something new, Romance, Smut, most likely some yaoi pairing, oc pairing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-20
Updated: 2017-12-20
Packaged: 2019-02-17 09:11:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13073745
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AriHasFallen/pseuds/AriHasFallen
Summary: Eren is recovering from a past tragedy and after many years of therapy he is trying to make things normal for himself. This is just an idea I had, if you guys don't like it I probably won't post anymore, but give feed back, I'm accepting of anything really. PS as you know I own nothing but my own characters





	An Internal Struggle

The somber weather outside the glass window set the mood in the room perfectly, at least for him it did. Eren Jaeger sat in a reclining chair across from his ever present psychiatrist as she set quietly waiting for him to speak. His forest green eyes peered past her and stared longingly at the outside, even with the bad weather he would rather be outside than in this stuffy room with dusty books and ugly knick knacks.

“Eren… Would you like me to start the session today? I think it’s about time we took a different approach. What do you think?” The elderly woman asked. The woman before him was at least 35+ years older than him putting her at about 57 or so. She was the only person that who was willing to take on the case. The state had ruled that the young teen, now fully grown man sitting in her office was in need of psychiatric help, even now 5 years after the incident he was still seeing her. “Eren?” she called one last time hoping to get his attention. He gave her an uncaring look before turning his eyes back to the grey sky. “Yea sure.” was his only verbal response. She could usually get nothing out of him but this was still a good sign. Sighing Doctor Rita pushed her glasses up her nose and looking down at her notes.

  A sigh escaped her pink lips as she got ready for some actual progress. “Eren you’ve been coming to me since you were about 16 or 17 and ever since the incident all you’ve said is you’re okay and that it doesn’t bother you anymore…However I believe this was more so to appease the court.” She knew she was getting somewhere as she saw his shoulders tense. “I’ve been telling you people for years that I’m fine, I thought once someone was cleared they could leave?” He snappishly replied. “Yes that may be the case for some, but you… haven’t been cleared Eren.”

  His jaw began to set, she could tell he was getting irritated. “I don’t see why I told you I’m fine. Even my friends could tell you I’m fine.” he growls out. “Yes, but I don’t think you’re actually okay Eren. And as long as I don’t think your fit to end our sessions you still have to come and see me every week. And as for your friends I’ve talked to a miss… Mikasa Ackerman and she is very worried about your mental stability as well as your commanding officer and you are already aware that you have been put on mandatory leave until you are cleared.” Dr. Rita knew she had hit sore spot for him. Eren had been avoiding Mikasa’s ever present gaze as he tried to move through life ignoring all the knowing stares of the people in their town. And to add insult to injury his job was on the line do to his so called mental instability

   “So what, that’s one person and besides Mikasa worries about every little thing. I don’t see what your point is.” he kept his tone leveled as he avoided eye contact more than ever.  
“But is she really wrong to worry? She was there too Eren… When it happened. She was able to go through her therapy and she was finished within 2-3 years. But we’re not here to compare. Everyone takes different amounts of time to heal Eren. Physically and emotionally. So why won’t you talk about it?” She continued to pry, hoping for some sort of break. He became still and it almost looked as though he had stopped breathing.  
She tried once more

  “Eren why won’t you talk about it? The only way to move past it is to talk about it and accept it.” the elderly woman urges him to speak. His fierce green eyes flashed as he swiftly turns his glare on her. He had finally snapped “Did I say I haven’t accepted it?! Because I don’t think I have much of a choice but to accept it. I was sitting right there as that psycho bitch butchered my mother!!! How the fuck would you react if your fathers crazy ex wife came back and decided to kill your family huh?! ” She didn’t speak up to interrupt. She had a feeling this was one of the only ways for him to realize his emotions. “And Mikasa probably got through it so damn fast because she’s adopted,they weren’t her family they were mine. So excuse me if I have trouble with the fact that the only person that ever cared about me is dead. My mother was the best woman to ever walk this god forsake planet…. And now...n-now she’s gone.” He said as tears came to his eyes. It was done.  
   “I became a cop so I could stop people like Dina from ruining families, so I could protect the people of this town from ever having to experience what I went through. I know what happened to me was tragic but I’m not the type of person to wallow in my own self pity I turned my sadness and grief into rage and something resourceful, I’m using my past as a source of motivation. I am here to protect the people of this town and I will stop any and every criminal that walks these streets.” He finally stopped ranting and began to wipe his eye. Rita smiled sadly but warmly at the young man before her. He had given her more than what she expected, she thought she knew him, thinking his past would be something to turn him into something more dangerous to either himself or others but from what she had witnessed she could tell that the man before her had become more than what she could ever imagine.  
   “Well would you look at the time… I think that’ll be all for you officer Jaeger… Final session next week.”

**Author's Note:**

> Personally feel like this chapter wasn't that focused but like I said this is only to see if anyone likes it enough for me to continue.


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